As a professional in-home caregiving agency, Golden Heart Senior Care frequently counsels the children of parents who need some help at home.  One of the biggest challenges is how to get their parents to be more accepting of outside caregivers.   At one point in time, a once-a-week visit to deliver groceries, change the bed sheets and run the vacuum may have been enough and the children could handle it themselves. But when more frequent contact and assistance becomes necessary, many children — who are busy with their own kids, activities and work — have to turn to outside sources for extra help. 

It’s not uncommon for elderly parents to resist care from strangers who will be coming into their own home among their cherished personal belongings. They fear the unknown. They fear that their personal space and confidentiality will be violated. They fear that they will no longer be in charge and will lose their independence. At Golden Heart Senior Care we understand all of this and are prepared to put everyone’s minds at ease.

If you are facing a similar situation, here are some tips and guidance…

  • Choose the right time to have the conversation with your parent about getting outside caregiving help. Holidays may not be the best time because this “intervention” could spoil a nice day with family if it does not go well. Also, this type of decision can require several conversations over time to get your parent used to the idea.Adult Daughter Talking To Depressed Father At Home  Plant the seed first, let it sit, then revisit it again in a couple of weeks.
  • Don’t “gang up” on your parent. Select one or two family members to sit down and have a quiet face-to-face conversation. Be open and honest about why you feel they need more help at home and why you and your siblings are not able to personally provide this.  Be calm, not combative.
  • Ask your parent to keep an open mind and remind them that hiring an in-home caregiver will allow them to continue to live in the comfort and safety of their own house.
  • Feel free to reverse the Guilt Trip! Tell your parent that getting some outside help from a reputable company will ease your worrying and give you peace of mind knowing they will be well taken care of when you are not able to be with them.
  • Let your parent know that you love them and will still be involved in their caregiving. You will be working with the caregiving agency to make sure all their needs are met and they are happy with their caregiver.article-0-08341047000005DC-418_468x296
  • Assure your parent that their caregiver will never force them to do anything against their will, and their privacy and confidentiality will always be respected. If there are areas of their house that are off limits (like a home office that might contain financial information) or treasured keepsakes that should not be touched, you should communicate this to the caregiving agency. Golden Heart Senior Care has a “Client Bill of Rights” that all employees must abide by.
  • Include your parent in the process of interviewing home care agencies and selecting one that they feel good about. Agency management will be selecting the caregiver for your parent and it’s important to communicate what type of person you may be looking for.  And be sure that whoever will be selecting the caregiver for your parent is at the interview and has met your parent.
  • Start slow. Begin with hiring a caregiver for just one day a week for a few hours. When your parent is comfortable and has established trust with their caregiver, consider increasing the number of days they visit.
  • Do not force your parent into the decision to hire an outside caregiving agency. This will not go well for anyone.

Additionally, the AARP offers an online guide to home caregiving.

With these tips and advice you should be successful in getting your parent to accept outside help.  And in time, they will truly look forward to getting visits from their caregiver! face-to-face-laughter_phpThumb_generated_thumbnailjpg

For more information about how Golden Heart Senior Care Rochester Hills can help your family, please call (248) 469-0021. 

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